This Valentine's Day, Give Your Players The Gift of Romance
Interview With Contributors of How To GM Romance
Here is your smoochin’ preview, y’all!
We are wrapping up production on How To GM Romance and it is my pleasure to highlight the work of some of our creators for the book. I’m so immensely proud of the writing, design, and art that has come in as we finalize the book! Without community support for queer art, unfortunately it would never see the light of day. Queer art is more important than ever with the current political climate in which bigots refuse us life saving healthcare, wish to erase us from history and even public life. Just as we must resist to exist, we must create and love to fully live.
A short interview with some of our creators is below. Please support these contributors by checking out their work and if you are interested - there is a link to pre-order How To GM Romance at the end of the article. You will also find more information and a fun teaser video on the Backer Kit page. Enjoy.

Q: What did you contribute to the book?
Coyoteprince (they/them): Queer and impoverished folk- of which both I and my supernatural cowboys are- are often read through an othering, harsh view. Whether it be simply uncomfortable or an outright threat, the point stands: a miasma of difference follows us with other's judgement often too distracted to view the context of why we are. I often explore this phenomenon through my work with effort to hint at what lies underneath the initial strange visage- something soulful, loving, and human. I do believe my hardy cowboys summarize this well. At first bright, brash, intimidating- but look a little closer, and you may just see a hint of something more.
Sebastian Yūe (they/them): I contributed the Romance Tracking System, a framework for GMs who want to facilitate romances between player characters and NPCs. Included in the system are a Romance Sheet and an Approval Tracker. The Romance Sheet helps you remember key details about romanceable NPCs, and the Approval Tracker offers a concrete approval score mechanic to represent an NPC’s attitude towards a player character, and instructions on how to use that score to roleplay the NPC’s responses to the player character’s actions.
Alex Roberts (she/her): Sex scene system, a question-oriented system that helps GMs and players create interesting, varied, and meaningful sex scenes.
Friday (she/they): The dispute system, date scenes, and I’m assisting with the romance adventure that my South American trans co-author Luna is masterfully piecing together. The dispute system is for fights, both leading to a break-up and also right back around to steamy encounters. What’s a little romance without spice, I say?
Q: Why is your contribution important?
Sebastian Yūe (they/them): The approval score system is a familiar mechanic inspired by similar systems in video games that feature companion romances, and I've adapted it for use in tabletop games and expanded guidelines for roleplay. The other systems in this book are connected to this central system. Importantly, a high approval score doesn't mean that a romance is necessarily more likely; I'm especially interested in enabling enemies-to-lovers or enemies-and-lovers dynamics. I want to help players and GMs have the spiciest possible time roleplaying complex, messy relationships.
Alex Roberts (she/her): I know players and GMs are both drawn to and intimidated by sex as a subject. I wanted to create a structured, but not restrictive, process by which players can create scenes that are about what actually makes sex interesting - which is less about what physically happens and more about what it means and how it feels for the people involved.
Friday (she/they): The dispute system and date scenes allow GMs to pick up the book and engage with players on a whole new level in a fun, popcorn-fueled spat or happy ending. Often we tune in for the drama, be it from Real Housewives style of trash reality TV or soap operas, to thoroughly dramatized history of our experiences in fiction or on HBO. Dynamic relationships are important to making your game feel real and without some gray area to romance there is a tendency to shove it into the background when it could be more fun.
Q: What is romance's place in tabletop games?
Coyoteprince (they/them): Tabletop games are all about community and cooperation- and you can't have either with a bit of romance here or there. It's a natural option that allows a different exploration of community.
Sebastian Yūe (they/them): Romance adds a new dimension to roleplaying; you can show a new side to a character who is in a romance that you wouldn't otherwise get to show. The way they act when in the presence of someone they have feelings for is a great way to reveal details about their history and personality. Romance is also a fun excuse to flirt with your friends.
Alex Roberts (she/her): Intimacy between people is one of the most common themes in... the entire history of human storytelling? (Many creation myths start with a bang.) We tell stories to find meaning in our experience, and romantic relationships are central to many of our lives.
Friday (she/they): I think that for my characters I prefer that they are three dimensional and part of that is to represent a character’s desires at every level. While roleplaying sex isn’t necessarily what the table is comfortable with, keeping things PG-13 or even R rated is generally acceptable, dependent on the audience. Even then, you could agree to more “steamy” private sessions via text at each individual’s comfort level. Be it a plain romance for dressing or a deep and fun-problematic romance, GMROM provides the tools for everything.
In exploring my queerness after I came out, I knew that I wasn’t looking for the normative stuff that was displayed in media, so I sought out more queer stories. As it turns out: A lot of queers engage with TTRPGs for this reason - there just isn’t a medium you can feel free like tabletop. In addition to that: Most GMs (pro or amateur) that I’ve spoken to felt as though there wasn’t a very good resource available for GMing romance. Both from an generalist advice angle and a hard mechanics situation, to also finding fluff to help the creative process. We’ve got your hardcore and your fluff, alright.
Q: Do you roleplay romance at your table? If so, what experiences would you like to share?
Sebastian Yūe (they/them): I absolutely do roleplay romance at the table! I'm in a 7-year-long D&D campaign and my wizard is romancing my friend's cleric. We're writing an erotic short story series based on the romance, which you can find here: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2941902 Some of the stories even have pictures from artists that we’ve commissioned. If you enjoy unhinged time magic, tragic backstories, and hot sex scenes, you’ll like the series.
Alex Roberts (she/her): Often! I make games about love, because that's the kind of game I like to play - I love complicated relationships, big feelings, and stories that resonate with real life.
Friday (she/they): It’s actually how I got into this mess in the first place! I’ve had poor experiences with romance in TTRPGs and other roleplaying mediums. Privately roleplaying romance as a woman was my way to survive while in the closet for many years in a world that forced its heteronormative agenda on me daily. It’s always been a safer (when given boundaries, session 0, cards etc.) way to explore without as many risks as being out in the dating scene. For those trying romance for the first time: might even find you are interested in something that you’d have never tried with a stranger or even a trusted partner in person.

Q: What do you think is missing from romance in games?
Sebastian Yūe (they/them): I think games [emphasis author’s] are missing romance! I'm hoping that this book makes it easier for GMs to introduce romance into games where romance isn't necessarily the main focus, but would be fun and interesting to explore as part of the story. I'm really excited for GMs to receive this book because it contains all sorts of useful tips and tricks for including romance in your game, even if you're new to it.
Check out the preview of How To GM Romance here!
Pre-order here! Every bit of support means a lot to us and helps keep queer art alive while livening up your roleplaying at the table.
